Emotional Intelligence 101: Taming the Beast Within!

love

what indeed is love? a warm and tender feeling in the pit of your stomach? a feeling of compassion for another?

all the above and much much more . from the rays of sunshine on your face to the breaching of a whale and the sound of a baby cooing and laughing .

it is what connects us to one another and to the beautiful planet we live on ! it is the core of Creation . it is what keeps us united as a people and as a family.

to keep it in our heart we must water and nurture it because love like fruit needs time to ripen. if you want to kill it just attach conditions and demands to it and expectations. all are reasons for anger and ultimately will destroy the love

emotional intelligence test

Here’s a quick, 7-question quiz, to determine your basic level of EQ.

How well do you deal with your Feelings and Emotions?
Rate yourself between 1 and 5 in each of the following seven areas.
1: not at all          3: so-so         5: totally and completely

1. Awareness
When your body feels something (fear, anger, sadness, shame, guilt, etc), how much do you notice and affirm your feelings?

        1       2       3       4       5

2. Identification
When you notice that you’re feeling something, how well can you Identify or Name the feeling you are having?  How well can you separate them (for example, fear and anger)?

        1       2       3       4       5

3. Acceptance
How "Ok" with you is it when you feel mad, or sad, or afraid?

        1       2       3       4       5

4. Expression
How well do you express your feelings and let them out, as opposed to stuffing or bottling them up inside?

        1       2       3       4       5

5. Release
Once your body feels a negative, yucky feeling, how well can you Let Go of that feeling and let it dissipate?

        1       2       3       4       5

6. Replace
How skilled are you at replacing "negative" feelings (anger, sadness, grief) with more "positive" ones (love, joy, peace)?

        1       2       3       4       5

7. Rejoice!
How well do you encourage and respect your feelings, complementing yourself for your awareness and expression?

        1       2       3       4       5

Scoring:  Add up your 7 answers to this emotional intelligence test.  If your score was between:

25-35    Excellent. 
You are fully aware of what's happening inside you.    Way to go.... my guess is that you are pretty darned happy, in general.

15-25   So-So. 
There's still plenty to learn.  There's a whole world inside you that you may not be fully aware of or have access to.  Do some work in this area and you will find more color, life and depth to your life!

0-15    Yikes!
You're clueless, and probably in pain!  Get help, fast.

To learn more:

• Read the other posts in this blog.
• 7 Steps to Healing Feelings:
  http://www.NewDirectionsWorkshop.com/docs/7StepsToHealingYourFeelings.pdf
• New Directions Weekend EQ Intensive
  http://www.NewDirectionsWorkshop.com

How did you do?  What do you need help with?

- Matt

Great Quotes

“BITTERNESS is like cancer. It eats upon the host.
But ANGER is like fire. It burns all clean.”
- Maya Angelou

 

“Life may not be the party we hoped for,
but while we're here we might as well DANCE!”
- Maya Angelou

 

“The honorary duty of a human being is to love.”
- Maya Angelou

 

“History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.”
- Maya Angelou

 

"The world breaks us all. Afterward, some are stronger at the broken places." 
- Ernest Hemingway

Happiness Quotes

"Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket, keep it

in your own." 
 

---

"Happiness isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...   It's about learning

how to dance in the rain" 

We Are The World

Here’s one of the greatest songs ever recorded! 

I just found this link on Twitter yesterday, but I’ve now listened to it about 10x, REALLY LOUD… and it still gives me chills (with all those amazing artists, it’s Cyndy Lauper’s climax that always gets me!).

I saved it as a Favorite, for an instant pick-me-up and to remind me what it’s all about.

Enjoy!

“It’s true we make a better day, just you and me.”

It’s about us!

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love.
In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.”

- Robert Muller

Forgiveness is for US, not so much for the person we’re forgiving!
Love is for US, not as much for the person we’re loving!
Giving is for US, not as much for the person who is receiving!

conclusion:  It really is ALL ABOUT US.

Feel It to Heal It.

We've found ways to safely & profoundly Feel & Release big negative feelings, both past and present, to bring Relief (often permanently).

These concepts were first developed by Alfred Adler, Sigmund Freud's partner.  Adler found babies are born "clean" - happy, powerful, totally in touch with emotions - but pain builds as we grow and is stuffed in our body

to return to "natural state", all we gotta do is Allow our bodies to Feel feelings as intensely as they were felt, & they Magically subside

sooo...

1. IDENTIFY what our body feels,
2. ALLOW ourselves to feel whatever,
3. EXPRESS it, as much as our body wants to,
4. LET IT GO!

... and PRESTO!, we feel way Much Mo Betta... every time... sometimes permanently! We can resolve and release childhood "Issues".

Blogging, the Blog Squad Way

I went to a presentation this morning at the Mendocino Coast Writer’s Conference where Denise Wakeman described how to effectively manage Social Media.

“If you can’t be found online, you don’t exist.”

Main Points:

1. Make the Blog the main focal point of our “platform”.
2. Use Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn as tools to drive traffic to the blog.
3. Be “Consistent and Constant” with our communications.
4. Schedule time to update, share and connect.
5. Use technology tools (which are almost all free!) to manage posts efficiently and effectively.
6. Don’t “sell”, as much as Educate, Share and Communicate.

My Conclusion:

This is a business-changer for me, so I will be “changing my ways” from here on.  Thanks, Denise!

=:^)

How to ‘Process’ out Negative Feelings

Step 1.  Awareness

Step 2.  Acceptance

Step 3.  Feel and Release

Step 4. Refresh and Rejoice!

"We gotta Feel it to Heal it!"

To ‘really’ get into your Feelings, ask yourself these 3 questions (slowly).

1.  Who or what are Hurt you the most?
2.  Who or what are you most Afraid of?
3.  Who or what are you Angry at?

If one of these doesn’t get you there, that’s probably depression.  Re-visit question 3.

EQ is the Bomb!!

If we wanna be Happy, we HAVE to get in touch with our feelings and emotions!  (no matter how uncomfortable it can be at times.)

If we wanna be Successful, we HAVE to get in touch with our feelings and emotions!  (or we can't be Real, even with ourselves.)

If we wanna be Powerful, we HAVE to get in touch with our feelings and emotions! (or our Fears may stop us, or distract us.)

EQ (emotional smarts) are more important than IQ (intellectual smarts) for both Happiness and Success in life.

period.