From a great book of essays written by a psychiatrist Gordon Livingston, Vietnam vet, parent twice bereaved, lost his oldest son to suicide and his youngest to leukemia. The book is entitled "Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart."
He has written about 30 bedrock truths:
1. If the map doesn't agree with the ground, the map is wrong.
2. We are what we do.
3. it is difficult to remove by logic an idea not placed there by logic in the first place.
4. The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas.
5. Any relationship is under the control of the person who cares the least.
6. Feelings follow behavior.
7. Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid.
8. The perfect is the enemy of the good.
9. Life's two most important questions are "Why?" and "Why not?" The trick is knowing which one to ask.
10. Our greatest strengths are our greatest weaknesses.
11. The most secure prisons are those we construct for ourselves.
12. The problems of the elderly are frequently serious but seldom interesting.
13. Happiness is the ultimate risk.
14. True love is the apple of Eden.
15. Only bad things happen quickly.
16. Not all who wander are lost.
17. Unrequited love is painful but not romantic.
18. There is nothing more pointless, or common, than doing the same things and expecting different results.
19. We flee from truth in vain.
20. It's a poor idea to lie to oneself.
21. We are all prone to the myth of the perfect stranger.
22. Love is never lost, not even in death.
23. Nobody likes to be told what to do.
24. The major advantage of illness is that is provides relief from responsibility.
25. We are afraid of the wrong things.
26. Parents have a limited ability to shape children's behavior, except for the worse.
27. The only real paradises are those we have lost.
28. Of all the forms of courage, the ability to laugh is the most profoundly therapeutic.
29. Mental health requires freedom of choice.
30. Forgiveness is a form of letting go, but they are not the same thing.
