Emotional Intelligence 101: Taming the Beast Within!

Get some Momentum in your Life!

“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.”

– Jack London

Career questions?
Personal issues?
Feel like you’re in a rut?

Get some Momentum in your life by working with a coach. Contact Joan at Momentum Coaching and open yourself to new possibilities. www.achieve-momentum.com.

A Feeling of Hope

10 of the hugest benefits people get from the ND weekend workshop.

a new understanding and appreciation for:

1. How powerful their feelings are/can be
2. The fact that everyone has them, and that's where we Connect with others.
3. The newly-found sense of Personal Power, and Confidence, and Pride. The sense that I AM in control of my life, from this day forward.
4. The discovery (or re-discovery) that feelings really ARE the key to Happiness
5. A new life-long attitude of Personal Responsibility (non-victim, non-blaming, personal choice)
6. An opening of the eyes as to how much Control we do have over our feelings and emotions, and attitudes, and values, and beliefs, and Behaviours.
7. A renewed positive outlook on life. On trust. On people. On the world.
8. Not feeling wrong, apart, weird, different, alone, but belonging, together, connected and an important part of a bigger whole.
9. Feeling Safe to feel whatever their body wants and needs to feel.
10. Incredible, life-enhancing Relief from dumping some of their excess emotional Baggage from the past.

and the biggest and bestest bonus of all...

An overall feeling of HOPE, that maybe the pain Can end.
Maybe I can be Happy, and powerful and Free!
Maybe I'll stick around for awhile and see how this life thing turns out.
Maybe life IS worth living.
Maybe it will all be Ok.
Maybe I'll be Ok.
Just maybe there's hope.

http://www.NewDirectionsWorkshop.com

- Matt

Life is a test!

This life is a test.
It is only a test.
If this had been an actual life,
You would have been given further instructions on where to go and what to do.

- something my dad used to say

Quotes on Purpose

"Our purpose is hidden in our joy, our inspiration, our excitement. As we act on what shows up in our life our purpose shows up."

- James King

"There is no more important step you can take than to define your life's purpose. It develops your sense of belonging to our universe."

- Arnold Patent

"Our mission is to educate and inspire people to live in their
Higher Self based in Courage, Purpose and Joy, versus Fear, Need and Obligation."

- T. Marv Eker

"The purpose of our lives is to add value to the people of this
generation and those that follow."

- Buckminster Fuller

"Hope, purpose and determination are not merely mental states.
They have electrochemical connections that affect the immune system."

– Norman Cousin

My Friends

I just realized that I have a wonderful situation set up--

MOST of my best friends, are also clients.

AND Most of my clients are now considered Friends!

Yeehaa!
- Matt

Awareness is the 1st Key to change

"If you view all the things that happen to you, both good and
bad, as opportunities, then you operate out of a higher level
of consciousness."
- Les Brown (Motivational Trainer)

Awareness is the 1st Key to change
So many of our beliefs, values and feelings come from our Unconscious mind.

Learn whatever you can about what's going on inside you... your unconscious emotional Beliefs... your unresolved pain and anger from childhood... the life decisions you made in the past that are still affecting you today.

"We cannot make decisions about things we are not AWARE of."
* Doc Downing, PhD, LMFT

Please find out what's going on inside you as an adult.
Make good, clean, conscious decisions about your relationships, jobs and friends.
Present and future-focused.
Not in unconscious Reaction to things that happened in the past. 
Otherwise, your life may be being run by a little kid and you are NOT in control.

"The Journey Inward: Our Last Great Adventure!"
* mcp

Quotes on Laughter

"We don’t laugh because we’re happy, we’re happy because we laugh."

- William James

"Laughter is like the human body wagging its tail."

- Anne Wilson Schaef

"More important than talent, strength, or knowledge is the ability to laugh at yourself and enjoy the pursuit of your dreams."

- Amy Grant, American Singer, Song Writer

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Blessed is he who makes his companions laugh."

- The Koran

Shame-based People

Let's talk about being "Shame-based".

We've established that the difference between Guilt and Shame is that Guilt is about something you DID that was bad, while Shame is the belief that you ARE bad.

So shame-based people believe they are bad people.

• They assume the worst.
• They assume life is dangerous and people are out to get them.
• They act like they're paranoid.
• They believe they are destined to get hurt and trashed emotionally, like they did as a child.
• They've tried 'thinking positive', but it doesn't change.

Shame is deep and shame is pervasive.  I learned from John Bradshaw "Healing the Shame that Binds you." that when we are shamed, we need to "GIVE IT BACK" to the person(s) who dumped it on us in the first place.  This "giving back" can be quite uncomfortable so the use of Anger as a tool and impetus to help is highly recommended.

It sounds something like this (best if done at full volume and intensity):
"I am NOT a bad person!"
"Take back your shame and your judgements and your criticism."
"I refuse to carry your judgements of me any longer!"
"I am a good person, no matter what you say or think."
(usually followed by powerful, healing cries that wash the pain away, making room for much-deserved love, light and self-esteem!)

Anger and Crying

If you find that you're crying and crying, with no relief... it's probably because you're also ANGRY... and need to deal with that, as well.

If you find that you're angry and angry, with no relief... it's probably because you're also HURT... and need to cry, as well.

We had a guy in last weekend's New Directions class who lost his 3-year-old daughter to cancer a few years ago. He's been crying ever since. This weekend we had him acknowledge and deal with his Anger... anger at the hospital, at God, at the whole situation... and poof, the crying stopped... much, much relief.

Try it.
- Matt

Difference between Feelings and emotions

What is the difference between feelings and emotions?

An interesting answer (from Google Answers) is here. Sites a number of different authors and points of view.

Read on...